<p><span>I was born in a gully and left to die in the Arizona wilderness, where I was found by a pack of wolves, who miraculously chose to raise me as their own. Years later, I was found by hunters and taken back to civilization, where I was featured as a sideshow attraction in Bim & Boffer’s Traveling House of Freaks. </span></p> <p>While on the road, I fell in love with Justine, one of the company’s Siamese twins. However, Justine and I were unable to keep our affair secret from Justine’s jealous sister, Naomi, and a bitter rivalry broke out that ended in heartbreak and bloodshed. I was forced to flee the freak show and move to California, where I became a screenwriter, playwright, independent filmmaker and comedian.</p> <p>I enjoy comedy, horror, science fiction, HP Lovecraft, Roy Rogers (the drink), film scores, Oingo Boingo, and making web videos about evil sock puppets.</p>